My Ears Have Feelings Too, You Know

It’s just got to be one of those irritating little facts of life that all earphones in the world are labelled WRONGLY.

I’m sorry, I don’t care what you think, but the earphone marked “L” is just more comfortable in my right ear, Mr Manufacturer. I can see that you’ve stuck a little bit extra onto the left side of the right earphone, but that fits just perfectly into my left ear. In fact, if I try and put it in my right ear, it just falls out.

I understand that you also feel the need to label them, because when I’m listening to Sweeney Todd The Original Broadway Cast featuring Angela Lansbury and the orgasmic voice of Len Cariou, I really need to hear different cast members sing from different sides of the stage. When I’m sharing my iPod with my friends or my sister and we’re listening to some really old song, one of us really has to get all the vocals, and the other has to be stuck with some shitty backing tracks. I mean, that’s okay, the way music was put together isn’t your fault – I understand, we need to know who’s going to be the one to get stuck without a melody line. We wouldn’t be able to tell if you hadn’t labelled them, after all.

I tried to think of more witty and sarcastic remarks as to why the labelling should be changed, but those were the only reasons I could think of as to why they are labelled at all. Really, I don’t actually check to see whether I’m putting them in the right ear or not, and with practise I’ve got used to putting them in correctly and comfortably first time.

So please. Give my ears some respect. They’d like to have the knowledge that an earphone was made especially for them, and it wasn’t labelled with the other ear’s name.

…I’m just being pedantic now, aren’t I?

Tags: humour, ipod, Music, Sweeney Todd