Dear Internet,
I am toying with the idea of leaving you. I can’t work out whether this is a beneficial relationship to me or not, and with the recent freeing up of my time, I can see that there is a potential for me to spend all my time with you, which I don’t think would be helpful to the other aspects of my life. Yes, I have one, sorry to say.
Let me tell you some of the reasons behind this consideration. Since I have finished my exams and started my A2 courses I have realised that I can put a lot more work into my studies which I have previously been neglecting and rushing over so that I can spend time messing around chatting online and maintaining my site. With predicted grades and Unis looming I can’t really afford to do this any longer, especially if my predicted grades aren’t as good as I’d hoped.
I also just don’t really have the motivation to keep up much of an online presence. Blogging’s gone down the toilet, coding and design is so rusty it almost doesn’t exist, and ultimately I either want to be there or not, I don’t want some half-hearted attempt of a blog online.
While I was on study leave, school also got a new filter system I can’t work out how to get around, which has blocked my site on the basis of it being “Social Networking and Personal” site, as well as many other blogs I read (for both the former and “Sexual Content” reasons… it’s surprising who is filtered and who isn’t). I could take this as a ~sign~, but it also means that I won’t be able to do much related to my site in school – a good thing which will force me to do work, I suppose, unless I’ll be writing a post in Word like I am now.
As for after school, I’m seriously considering Music as an alternative to Computer Science at Uni. This means that I need to practise my violin to keep my standard up, and I’ll have to pick up my piano playing again and get that up to at least Grade 5/6 standard. I’ll also be playing a Concerto or Sonata for my A2 recital, very possibly performing Solo in a school concert next year as well as on Tour, and I have my Grade 8 singing in December. I might try a choral scholarship, too.
So, you see, I will be rather busy. I’ve tried all this out, and it seems I just don’t have much time for other things. Not that I really want to leave, though. I don’t want to be just another one of those people who gets sick of blogging – after all, just because I haven’t thought of something for a month doesn’t mean I won’t have a whole load to talk about after the summer – it’s all seasonal with me it seems. And Symphonic is just getting off the ground, really. Also I’ve made quite a few friends on teh interwebz, and I do enjoy talking to them all. I just seem to waste so much time doing so – I can sign on meaning to stay for 10 mins and chat for an hour without realising. Hum de dum.
Dear internet, I hope you don’t feel insulted at my apparent betrayal of you. Thank goodness this is a relationship where I’m the only one who has to be pleased, ultimately.
I’ll be back to tell you how my grades were and what I’ve decided. In the meanwhile I’ll post some spare posts I’ve been saving up.
P.S. Don’t listen to a word I say today. My uterus feels like it is being scrubbed with a nail brush.
Aw, Internet totally understands. It would be sad if you do decide to leave us, though – I really enjoy your blogs and such. But obviously it’s up to you, and whatever schoolwork you have must come first.